Eloise if it was a girl

Walking from the clinic that day
Melting tears with the London rain
Tell you we did the right thing
The truth is I feel like a killer

I wish I thought that we had a choice
I wanted so hard to stop the hurt
And give my name to your baby boy
Eloise if it was a girl

I’m leaving, across the water, to different weather, another country
Will you join me, in other seasons, another lifetime, far away?

Nightmare babies crawl on my skin
As you lay there and fake your sleep
You need to go, and I know you will
Pain can scar, but then so can guit

I broke your heart and I crushed your world
That I do know without your words
Stunted joy of our would-be child
Eloise if it was a girl

I’m leaving, across the water, to different weather, another country
Will you join me, in other seasons, another lifetime, far away?